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October 23 Bullzip MS Access to MySQL
October 18 Onthoud de 4 letters (G-A-S-T) - Herkennen van een beroerte
Dokters zeggen dat een omstaander een aanval kan herkennen door het stellen van vier simpele vragen: G * GLIMLACHEN: Vraag de persoon om te GLIMLACHEN (de mondhoeken moeten beiden simultaan omhoog gaan). A * ARMEN OMHOOG STEKEN: Vraag hem de ARMEN ALLEBEI OP TE STEKEN (de armen moeten beide gelijktijdig en met dezelfde moeite omhoog te tillen zijn).
Als hij of zij moeite heeft met eender welke van deze taken, bel dan onmiddellijk 100 of 112 en beschrijf de symptomen aan de dispatcher. Benadruk dat er haast is geboden ! October 13 IPhone-equipped passenger takes on flight crew over weather
Instead of telling this clown what he can do with his ‘IdiotPhone’ (or where he can shove it), the captain did it even better. He gets on the PA and makes the following announcement: “If the passenger with the iPhone would be kind enough to use it to check the weather at our alternate, calculate our fuel burn due to being rerouted around the storms, call the dispatcher to arrange our release, and then make a phone call to the nearest Air Traffic Control center to arrange our timely departure amongst the other aircraft carrying passengers with iPhones, then we will be more than happy to depart. Please ring your call button to advise the flight attendant and your fellow passengers when you deem it ready and responsible for this multi-million dollar aircraft and its passengers to Needless to say, the pax was pretty embarrassed. The flight attendant later told us the rest of the plane was outright laughing at this dude. What a clown…. Verslavend spelletje…Probeer de kat te omcirkelen (in te sluiten). Succes!
Gekke wolken…Als iemand me hier meer info over kan bezorgen, graag! Volgens mij is het in Australië…
Adrenaline kick nodig?
Do not try this at home! Famous People Painting "Discussing the Divine Comedy with Dante" Test je kennis! Een overzichtje van geschiedkundig belangrijke figuren samengebracht in een enkele afbeelding met links naar Wikipedia. Hier kan je wel een paar avonden mee vullen! September 12 Wuven achter 't stuur (Westvloams voor gevorderden)Voor de West-Vlamingen...'t is ne goeien !!
Voor de niet West-Vlamingen 't is een goeie les. Liefst hardop lezen... Hilarisch!!!!!
Gisterennuchten riek noar kortrik up dotostrade...
 Up me gemakske, jekent mie . Ke kiekken azo over min schoere en kzie doar e wuf in n nieuwen BMW passeren an 140 tereure met eur tote tegen de rute in de spegel te kiekken om eur ogevlerken te kunn schildern. Je moe da eke peizen...
Ik kiekken were voi me voor e poor seconden, moar angezien da dadde gin lelyk keun was... kzegge kgon nog moar e ki loern... Miljaarde nondedju, ze zat godver bikan up min... en mo schildern (nog e couche)... Je kunt eki peisn dak verschoten en... me scheirmasjiene viel ut men nan, flak up men eclairtje dak in men ander nand an. Met dak met men nan vulzaoten hak me stuur tusschen me knien moet steken vaneigens, en deur dak moetn utwykken stukkn'k tegen me telefongstatiftje, me telefong volt noa beneen, flakin me zjatje kaffie tusschen min billen. Je kut e ke gon peizen die hete kaffie up me spriet, me kljingeld verbrandt... en me telefong no de wup... en vaneigens nog e ke me corespondensje onderbrookn wok...
Godver, Godver, je zoet de'r ollik van braken van wuven achter 't stuur!!!! Lizard birth - Absolutely hilarious! If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome, including toilet flush burials for dead Goldfish, the story below will have you laughing out LOUD! Overview: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet.
Here's what happened:
Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was 'something wrong' with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room.
'He's just lying there looking sick', he told me. 'I'm serious, Dad. Can you help?'
I put my best lizard-healer expression on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I immediately knew what to do.
'Honey', I called, 'come look at the lizard!'
'Oh, my gosh!' my wife exclaimed. 'She's having Babies.'
'What?' my son demanded. 'But their names are Bert and Ernie, Mom!'
I was equally outraged.
'Hey, how can that be? I thought we said we didn't want them to reproduce,'I said accusingly to my wife.
'Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?' she inquired
(I think she actually said this sarcastically!) 'No, but you were supposed to get two boys!' I reminded her,
(in my most loving, calm, sweet voice, while gritting my teeth). 'Yeah, Bert and Ernie!' my son agreed.
'Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you know,' she informed me. (Again with the sarcasm!)
By now the rest of the family had gathered to see what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make the best of it.
'Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience' I announced. 'We're about to witness the miracle of birth.'
'Oh, gross!' they shrieked
'Well, isn't THAT just great? What are we going to do with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?' my wife wanted to know.
We peered at the patient ... After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later.
'We don't appear to be making much progress,' I noted.
'It's breech,' my wife whispered, horrified.
'Do something, Dad!' my son urged.
'Okay, okay.' Squeamishly, I reached in and grabbed the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug. It disappeared I tried several more times with the same results.
'Should I call 911?' my eldest daughter wanted to know.'Maybe they could talk us through the trauma.' (You see a pattern here with the females in my house?)
'Let's get Ernie to the vet,' I said grimly. We drove to the vet with my son holding the cage in his lap.
'Breathe, Ernie, breathe,' he urged.
'I don't think lizards do Lamaze,' his mother noted to him.
(Women can be so cruel to their own young. I mean what she does to me is one thing, but this boy is of her womb, for G~d's sake). The vet took Ernie back to the examining room and peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass.
'What do you think, Doc, a C-section?' I suggested scientifically.
'Oh, very interesting,' he murmured. 'Mr. And Mrs. Cameron, may I speak to you privately for a moment?'
I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside.
'Is Ernie going to be okay?' my wife asked.
'Oh, perfectly,' the vet assured us. 'This lizard is not in labor. In fact, that isn't EVER going to happen. Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a young male. And occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most male species, they um ...um, masturbate. Just the way he did, lying on his back.' He blushed, glancing at my wife.
We were silent, absorbing this.
'So, Ernie's just, just...excited,' my wife offered.
'Exactly,' the vet replied, relieved that we understood.
More silence. Then my vicious, cruel wife started to giggle, and giggle. And then even laugh loudly.
'What's so funny?' I demanded, knowing, but not believing that the woman I married would commit the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness.
Tears were now running down her face. 'It's just that ...I'm picturing you pulling on its...its...teeny little... ' She gasped for more air to bellow in laughter once more.
'That's enough,' I warned. We thanked the vet and hurriedly bundled the lizard and our son back into the car. He was glad everything was going to be okay.
'I know Ernie's really thankful for what you did, Dad,' he told me.
'Oh, you have NO idea,' my wife agreed, collapsing with laughter.
Two lizards: $140.
One cage: $50.
Trip to the vet: $30.
Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's winkie: Priceless!
Moral of the story: Pay attention in biology class.
Lizards lay eggs!
September 01 TUI...Großvater sorgt sich um seinen Enkel, der inzwischen 18 ist, aber nie
> das Haus verlässt weil er ständig vor dem PC sitzt. > > Eines Tages spricht ihn der Großvater an: "Weißt du, was ich in > deinem Alter getan habe?" > "Ne, was denn?" > "Wir sind nach Paris ins Moulin Rouge gefahren, haben gefressen, > gesoffen, > haben den Weibern an den Titten rumgespielt, haben dem Barmann an die > Theke gepisst und sind ohne zu zahlen gegangen." > Dem Enkel scheint diese Vorstellung zu gefallen, nicht nur das, nein > sie lässt ihn nicht mehr los, also entscheidet er sich dasselbe zu > tun. > Inzwischen sind zwei Wochen vergangen und der Großvater kommt wieder > zu Besuch. Da sieht er seinen Enkel komplett eingegipst und nur noch > mit der Hälfte seiner Zähne. > "Mein Gott was ist mit dir passiert?" > "Tja Großvater. Wir sind nach Paris ins Moulin Rouge gefahren, haben > gefressen, gesoffen, den Weibern an den Titten rumgespielt, haben dem > Barmann an die Theke gepisst und wollten ohne zu zahlen gehen. Da > haben sie uns voll vertrimmt." > Fragt der Großvater: "Mit wem wart ihr denn da?" > "Mit der TUI!" > "Hmh, ja", brummt der Großvater, "das war der Fehler!" > "Warum, mit wem warst du denn da?" > "Mit der Wehrmacht!"  July 06 Flor & Tim: we zullen jullie missen!
Flor was voor mij meer dan een zweefvliegexaminator, hij was mijn parrain. Iemand waar ik steeds bij terecht kon voor levensvragen, inzicht of een ongezouten maar genunanceerde mening. Ik zal je missen Flor. Er was nog teveel dat we samen gingen doen. Tim, voor mij zal je altijd het schoolvoorbeeld van een gedreven sleeppiloot blijven. Je was één brok motivatie. Was er iets mis met de Piper dan zou je de hele nacht gezocht hebben naar een oplossing zodat de aspiranten en flights niet één minuut minder zouden vliegen omwille van jou. Heren, hou een oogje in het zeil als wij terug het luchtruim kiezen! --- Bij wijze van eerbetoon aan beide heren en tevens als steun voor de familieleden is er een rouwregister opgestart. Neem 5 minuutje tijd en laat even een berichtje achter op http://condoleances.belgianaircadets.be July 03 De Standaard Online - Twee doden bij vliegtuigongeluk in Goetsenhoven
De Standaard Online - Twee doden bij vliegtuigongeluk in Goetsenhoven June 23 Super Tweaks voor MS Office 2007May 30 MS Outlook Connector .ost file location...Discussion Groups Home First of all, Outlook Connector is a wonderful addition to the office suite and I found it to be a very useful way to upgrade my hotmail experience (and for free!) However, one thing that is a real PITA with outlook connector is the program's stubborn usage, and lack of flexibility, with OST (offline mail account storage) files. It's a bit of a mixed bag re: OC recreating this file with every new install or migration of outlook. The good news: no need to backup the .ost file (don’t waste your time anyway, because connector will never recognize a file that a particular installation did not create, i.e.: un-migratable) as one would do for a .pst (personal folders file) to transfer over to a new installation or another computer. The bad news: this un-backupable file has a location that can be at best inconvenient and at worst downright unworkable. As far as I can see, there is no justification for not providing a way to relocate OC’s .ost file for use with hotmail. In my case, I bought a netbook with a meager 4gb SSD (hey, it was cheap). After the windows installation and installing NO other programs on C: I have exactly 200 or so megabytes free. With 500MB of emails in my hotmail account, using connector (even just downloading headers, not full messages) simply grinds my OS to a halt-unnecessarily. This is more than an inconvenience, and there is really no justifiable reason for outlook connector to place an unwieldy-sized file in the default user directory while offering NO options to change the default location. Just my 2¢, but this is really something that the Microsoft Outlook Connector team should seriously consider in the next revision. Thx. |
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